Adrenaline Rush

So the adrenaline of everything really did make me happy. Now, however, I have supported my brother being a jerk to him. He was a jerk first...BUT I am probably supposed to be the bigger person. I was talking to a mutual friend that we have. He said, "You know that things will never be the same now." I was pretty sure that I was ready for it...but now I don't know. Forever is a long time. He was mean to me. I mean...come on...he left me stranded in the airport. BUT I can't stop the feelings of...I AM THE IDIOT. This might have just all blown over. We might have still been able to be friends. I should have been stronger. I should have done better. I should not have given his number to my brother. I should not have promoted my brother being mean to him. He did hurt me terribly bad, but I was handling it. I was surviving. I was ok because I knoew that it was all his fault. Now he has kind of played it onto me...and of course I have to feel bad. It's my fault we are no longer friends. Why do I have to feel bad?!! I just want to say that he started it!!! Then I feel like I am in kindergarten though. There is just no winning this battle. He did show his true colors though...did I really want to be friends with someone that would do that to me? Probably not. I just hate the fact that he spinned it to make me feel like this is my fault...this whole situation is dumb...He just texted and threatened to send my brother back to jail. Right...Who does that?! THIS IS NOT MY FAULT. Grown people should have been able to talk this out. I tried...like bordering on insane amount of times. I was nice. I am the one that got left at the airport and I am the one that has to be nice. Go figure.